Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
