Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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