her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside