i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I love having hate sex.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.