Your face is a jimmy john
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Is it because I queefed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Hippo gnu deer
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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