hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.