So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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