i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
