My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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