I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
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