oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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