Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize