And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.