She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.