If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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