the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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