I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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