I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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