It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
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There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
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He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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