Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Are these your boobs on my camera?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
