I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize