Texts From Last Night

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  (813): View more from Florida

  I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.

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  (813): I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life. http://tfl.nu/zrqp
  Replies (41) Good night (5089) Bad night (1278)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.

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  (219): Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream. http://tfl.nu/v6je
  Replies (37) Good night (6994) Bad night (770)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  only in oregon

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  (541): at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking (1-541): only in oregon http://tfl.nu/1bea
  Replies (156) Good night (7592) Bad night (1092)
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  (228): View more from Mississippi

  Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!

  (1-228): View more from Mississippi

  brownberry?

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  (228): Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!! (1-228): brownberry? http://tfl.nu/y1s8
  Replies (19) Good night (1387) Bad night (6014)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?

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  (504): How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need? http://tfl.nu/pqn5
  Replies (27) Good night (7214) Bad night (1090)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.

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  (262): Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta. http://tfl.nu/1aj3
  Replies (29) Good night (6580) Bad night (1168)
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  (310): View more from California

  I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea

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  (310): I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea http://tfl.nu/towc
  Replies (7) Good night (2686) Bad night (1230)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.

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  (785): this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila. http://tfl.nu/7xsl
  Replies (3) Good night (1414) Bad night (999)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.

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  (917): I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking. http://tfl.nu/qvff
  Replies (23) Good night (1338) Bad night (3669)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.

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  (204): when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape. http://tfl.nu/srkz
  Replies (2) Good night (2150) Bad night (596)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all

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  (651): So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all http://tfl.nu/5r9b
  Replies (2) Good night (737) Bad night (437)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over

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  (610): first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over http://tfl.nu/fqcy
  Replies (2) Good night (731) Bad night (416)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.

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  (+61): Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things. http://tfl.nu/ocj8
  Replies (4) Good night (609) Bad night (321)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.

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  (918): Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art. http://tfl.nu/zfiz
  Replies (2) Good night (712) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.

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  (705): I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it. http://tfl.nu/763y
  Replies (0) Good night (494) Bad night (275)

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