Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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