Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
