i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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