they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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