i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I have already put on my inside pants.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize