I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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