And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize