Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
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Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*