What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
