if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
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