Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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