If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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