you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
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want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
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I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
We need to get me chipped asap
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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