I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
