I want you more than these girls want KFC
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize