it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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