Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize