I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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