Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
