somebody snuck up and got me drunk
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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