Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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