Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
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No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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