Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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