i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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