just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
