so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
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Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
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Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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