I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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