My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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