just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.