Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize